Pivotal Moment


September 18, 2009

oh heavens –

Inevitably my life is changing, and with it so must I.

I feel the perpetual momentum of time, always moving, pushing and prodding, propelling me forward.

Days slide through and behind me, passing, approaching with frantic pace to my departure – the pivotal moment.

From this point, for me, nearly everything will be different. I will be wound round through a torrent of  unpredictability. These years spent, compiling elements of comforts to a nest of well known, well loved habits and routines – I will leave them behind. Their significance, carved into the walls of my soul, will remain only in the impact they’ve impressed upon me. These I will allow to wane beneath the magnitude of what is to come.  They will be a casualty to the brooding nature of the unwritten future.


I’ll hug, kiss and hold my old memories, promise to visit them soon – and turn to face what still remains to make itself known to me.

How best to prepare oneself for a tempest of such sorts ?

As I consider my up and coming emergence into the world at large, a personal debut ,  I see how stark and spare my little reservoir of knowledge truly stands – a fledgling intellect – so lacking in exposure and experience.

I strain and stretch my mind to conceive some lucid perception of what my time will be like spent in Guatemala, and  grasp at best towards fleeting images from some Nat Geo Special.

I realize now – what could I truly know of these things?

I am choosing now to dismantle these biased illusions, my gross overgeneralization of the majority of the world. I have made a mistake. I imagine the developing world all entirely too much as one category – I have mentally lumped such a large portion of the population into one stereotyped idea. Reflecting on my perceptions of global poverty, I see now that I have done such a maganaminimous number of people a true injustice – i have denied them in my thinking the unique nature in each and every one of their complexly, deeply, intricately and undeniably different situations.

It is time I acknowledge my naivety, before leaving into the world  with preconcieved notions, baseless assumptions.