Back in November, I came across an article online that was titled 15 Things to Give Up Now to Make Yourself More Happy on the most socially-popular media site, Facebook. Despite the millions of useless articles and status updates that is thrown onto my newsfeed daily, this particular article caught my eye because I only thought, What does THIS article know about becoming happier?
Ideally, I opened it and read all of it. Most of this applied to myself, to my journey in Ecuador and life in general. I would like to share this list with you.
1. Give up your need to always be right because in the end, none of that bossy, I-need-everything-to-go-perfect attitude will inspire anyone. Being in a new country with new accustoms should be an eye-opener that you can’t always be right, since you know nothing. Period.
2. Give up your need for control. Like #1, trying to make people, animals, buildings, and everything else in your view obey you will only result in a crash-and-burn effect where you end up angry since you can’t dictate as everyone is living their own lives and not the instructions you gave them. More so since animals and buildings will not (or cannot) obey anyone.
3. Give up on blame. Take responsibility of your actions. A fight can’t happen with only one person.
4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk. “The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” -Eckhart Tolle. If you can’t use your own brain to uplift yourself during tough situations, how can others possibly help?
5. Give up your limiting belief. “A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind.” -Elly Roselle. Let your thoughts go free and while they’re roaming free, learn the beliefs of those around you.
6. Give up complaining. Develop perspective from the other end of the spectrum. Complaints come from how you look at things.
7. Give up the luxury of criticism. Let things be the way they are.
8. Give up your need to impress others. You don’t want to give people the wrong idea that you “try too hard.” Just impress and fascinate yourself.
9. Give up your resistance to change. What a perfect example I’m living! New country, new culture, new me. The 3 news. Even if you’re not in a new country, giving up trying to keep everything the same will allow you to find out more about yourself and even come to love something you have never tried before.
10. Give up labels. You’re not canned food. You don’t need labels, and other people don’t need them either.
11. Give up on your fears. Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist– you created it. Get out of your comfort zone and conquer the things that are holding you back.
12. Give up your excuses. The more excuses we make, the more we get stuck in our lies. Stop digging a hole for yourself and fill it up with honest dirt.
13. Give up the past. It’s not coming back, so might as well stop looking at it. Instead, go forward and make a better past you’re not afraid to leave behind.
14. Give up attachment. “Do not give up love because love is pure, kind, and self-less. Where there is love, there can’t be fear and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist.”-Unknown. Attachment is not the deep relationship you’ve built with friends, family, etc. Attachment is the inability to live your own life because you are dependent on someone else to live it for you.
15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations. Not living your life means that you’re forgetting about yourself. Carve your own path for you to walk through.
Some of the items on this list are things that are harder to give up than others, but letting go of the restraints you’ve put on yourself and accepting others for the way they are puts someone on the track for a happier self. I still have a lot to look up to within this list, but after I read the article, you know what? Maybe this article really does know what it’s talking about in terms of happiness.