it’s a Splash

Marta Shcharbakova - Senegal


March 21, 2019

Now, this is a vulnerability alert: I am even more lost than I was before I
came to Senegal.

Belarus, Singapore, UWC, Senegal. That’s what I’m made of. Now: sitting in
a chear, starring somewhere ahead of me. I see so much in front of me: so
many things, alternative realities, but I’m not amongst them. I wish I
wanted to explain this, but I will let me and my teenage angst be. Here’s
the words I want, but can’t exactly say.

I love you, my Senegalese family. Please don’t forget me, because I will
carry you inside forever. Ndeye Magget, Mame Bousso, Abdoukan, don’t grow
up too fast. You are too mature already. I hope I’ll catch you before you
become too responsible.

Pape C., I’m sorry I never converted, but you managed to make me question
my believes and ideals very well. Now you owe me some nerves you “saay
saay”. Mohammed, and the rest of the boys: you made my stay here SO much
richer, and that farming wouldn’t end up being any type of experience
without you.

Ousmane – thank you for being the Toubab in the house with me, joking like
me so that only we get each other, even when it’s in Wolof.

Yaay, Baay, I have no words for you. But we never really needed them, did
we?

Fellows: I’m grateful and very proud of every single one of us. Each person
for the different reasons, because we are all so different.

This freaking country blew my mind, 1000000000000 experiences that were
just put into my hands and I was left with. 1000000000000 responsibilities
I have no idea how to take care of. How could you make me leave now?

Did I have fun? Yes

Does it make me want to come back? Yes

Did I learn? If it means that I have to question my opinions – yes

Am I more humble? No idea

Was I challenged? Physically – yeah, mentally – YES

Did I find myself? What is this question even

Can I deal with all of this information? No

And now we are free, Biiiirds. Good bye.

[image: IMG_2702.jpg]

Marta Shcharbakova