In this moment I see me!!

Chinyere Aniagoh - Ecuador


March 1, 2013

I’m so happy at this very moment not in a silly playful happy way butjust a moment of true bliss, thus I decided I’ll just write exactly what I’m feeling. Although, I know everything isn’t perfect and neither am I or will I ever be, but at this time in my life here in Ecuador I am the most satisfied I’ve every been in my whole life, not thinking about whats to come tomorrow or what has happened yesterday. I’ve excepted the uncertainty in what will happen next in my life but some how I know everything’s going to be OK, because everything has been OK and everything is OK… Lol it’s kind of ironic that I feeling this way right now with literally less than 15 dollars to my name and, my mom, who should be in Ecuador with me isn’t here but somehow everything right now is as it should be. As I listen to Rihanna’s song “Diamonds” on my Iphone on my way back to Mindo I just want to thank Ecuador; thank you for teaching me how to be happy again. Through all the craziness I’ve been through since I’ve gotten to Ecuador I have found myself. I know who I am and what I want to be. I had be conscientiously looking for me for what seems like years. I remember me around this time last year so confused, lost, frustrated and disappoint with life literally crying myself to sleep sometimes. I had no idea who Chinyere was and that made me insane. It was a struggle between my inside self, my outside self, the self I thought I was and the self I wanted to be. But right now, in this very moment, I feel a line, balanced and whole. I have surmounted my self limits, I am more aware and determined then I have ever been. Thank you Global Citizen year. Thank you for seeing the person I couldn’t see. Thank you for choosing me, thank you for believing in me, because to be honest, I didn’t I truly believed in myself. Forget a year of college. No college could have cleared my path for life as this experience has. It’s like my Spanish when i first came to Ecuador, it was a baby as was I. Not knowing the “words”, the way; now my Spanish has grown as have I, finding my way.. I’ve literally brought myself to tears writing this, because now only 7 months later, I can SEE MYSELF… WOW! look what I’ve become. I don’t know how I’m going to say goodbye to my journey, my light, my life, Ecuador. But I’m sure with the will of my god and the support of my family my next journey will be just as golden. Again, thank you Ecuador for finding ME Chinyere Joyce Aniagoh. The African American, half Nigerian girl from Atlanta. The dancer, the cry baby and the sassy, well spoken, attitude having at times… The sensitive insightful ambitious, a little materialistic and so much more. Thank you Ecuador for teaching me how to fall in love with myself again. Lol I guess it was worth the ten pounds gained.

Chinyere Aniagoh